This is not to say I won’t kill a character.

(Ilea turned to stone by a beholder. Sadi bitten in half by a Tyrannosaurus Rex skeleton. Alek’s head crushed by a fire giant. Sadi blown to bits by an evil sorcerer. Indira blown to bits by a beholder’s eye stalk.)

Or that every character shouldn’t be worried about dying. (Cinder dragged underwater by a sea monster.  Myntilly grappled by two chokers.  Ian grappled by a tarry demon. Acgar singled out by a black dragon. Indira and Brus embroiled in a column of flame.)

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But death in Dungeon and Dragons is so…done.  It lacks creativity.  Not only this, it is not even a difficult obstacle to overcome.  All you need is a night’s rest and 10,000gp worth of diamonds.  Bah.

So much more interesting to put the party to sleep and have them wake up in a dark cavern tied up, naked, and bereft of gear.  Or to teleport them 500 miles away to a barren desert.  Or capture one of the characters and take her to places unknown.  Or capture two characters and take them to two different places.

Buzz said it best in his post about the beholder.  Sure, the beholder could just eat the bear, or use its finger of death eyestalk and that would be it.  But no, the beholder is truly evil.  Instead charm the bear and make everyone work hard.  Put the strongest, beefiest hitter to sleep.  Distract, hinder, confuse, and otherwise wield chaos on the players to suit the beholder’s own evil whims.

In fact, now that I mention it, is anyone wondering why the beholder didn’t play for keeps?  I mean really, with 9 eyestalks (one is missing), it has 9 attacks each round.  That’s enough for each character to get hit each round.  Sure the save DC of 18 is reasonably low.  But roll low on them and the character is incapacitated or dead.  Come to think of it, that beholder didn’t really use all of his attacks each round.

So what is that beholder up to?

I heard a splash and a hissing. The beholder was smoking a bit. Ha! Myntilly had used orb of acid on him. Nice. But I hope she’s careful. He might figure out where she is. Not that I can see her when she’s invisible.

Like he was on a string, Triple Tail zoomed back to the wall. Crazy shit. I don’t get it, except that maybe beholders just like to mess with your mind.
Acgar took advantage of the opening to breathe acid at the beholder.
She was very sure not to hit Brus, who was curled up like a puppy at the beholder’s feet. Er, where the beholder would have feet. If beholders had feet. They don’t.

From my vantage, I could see that Indira was bleeding pretty badly from that shoulder wound.
I had a feeling I’d regret it, but I ran out and stood behind her.
She needed healing.
“The Father shines through me and into you, sister.” She looked at me over her shoulder and winked. I heard her say:
“He does indeed shine through me, brother.” And four sunbeams shot from her right hand. It was glorious to see. Each ray hit an eye stalk and seared it shut.

Before I could begin to cheer, the beholder whirled around and eyes from the undamaged side turned towards us. I felt the air grow warm. A breeze stirred Indira’s kerchief. And then, BLAM. Indira fell flat at my feet and a moment later, she exploded into a million tiny pieces.

This is the scene as near as I can remember. That’s me in the corner, with Acgar. Right as the invisible hellcat attacked. We were in Nulin’s room and it was kinda fun. Dude was so insanely paranoid — I guess assassins kinda have to be, right? And so the place was like Booby Trap Land or something. The bed was all trapped and if you triggered it, it would slam into the wall like a possessed Murphy bed. Wild. There is a stream of lava that runs through the room. Came in handy later, but I’ll get to that.

So Sadi and Ian both have boots of spider climb. So they went up the walls to try to avoid traps. Yeah, right. The walls and ceiling were trapped, too. So they are making their way around the room. Me and Acgar were discussing the runes on the floor. Indira and Brus were just standing by the bed. And none of us paid any attention to Theresa. She’s always poking around. To hear her tell it later, she jumped across the lava stream and landed on a little pillow. That’s when all hell broke loose. Did I say hell? I mean it. The fiery, killing sort of hell.

First I know, I hear a growl and Acgar yells, whirls and slams into something. Something that doesn’t move. Something with claws. I hear Indira yell, too. And then there’s this… sizzling sound.

I look over in time to see like liquid flame just wham! down on Indira and Brus. Like it wasn’t there and then it was.

Just this shower of fire, dumped on them like water. They were outlined in flame for a few moments and I could clearly see the outline of the hellcat as it slumped over. Dead or stunned, I didn’t know.

Indira must have heard the noise, too. Because she stumbled a bit but she missed being in the dead center of the firestorm.

That’s where Brus was. The middle.

Have you ever smelled burning bear fur? It’s gross. Trust me.

It was all like slo-mo. I can see it when I close my eyes. Indira’s hair on fire. Brus on his hind legs struggling to escape the flames.

I had no thought of Acgar or the hellcat right beside us. I — if I had any thoughts, any real thoughts, it was simply to save Indira. At that moment it all solidified for me. If she dies…. I don’t know what I’d do.

Her name ripped from my throat as I ran to her. I’m not some hero guy. I didn’t run through the flames. Luckily they were dying out anyway. What was that spell?

Indira was laying at a strange angle but she was coughing so I knew she’d be OK. As I slid to a stop near her, I realized that she was propped on the still invisible carcass of the hellcat. I would have laughed if I hadn’t been preoccupied.

She looked like hell. She hair is charred. We’ll have to cut it off — what’s left of it.
I grabbed her hand. Her return grip was strong. “Help me up.” She said. We got her upright and our combined heal got her breathing back to normal.

At that point I felt the rest of the world come back. Acgar was off to my left, her sword flashing as she fought the hellcat. I didn’t see Brus, but I hoped that was a good sign. If he could run, he was going to be OK. My eye caught movement in the far right corned. Sadi was standing on the wall and I saw her dump flour on to the ground. The shape of a man formed where the flour hit. Ha! Our invisible spellcaster, perhaps?

It was incredibly heroic of Sadi to expose the enemy that way. She was in such a vulnerable spot, right above him.

I saw him turn and then Sadi was gone. Everything, gone. I keep replaying it in my mind. He turns and she’s gone. Turn, gone. Who or what was this?

Indira hadn’t seen it happen. I’ll always be grateful that she didn’t see Sadi’s last seconds. I’m sure there was no pain for Sadi. How could there be? Blink. Gone.

I caught movement and Ian was casting a spell over to the left. Mr. Big Bad wasn’t looking that way. He was looking my way. My mouth went dry. I’d always heard that expression but yeah, for real it happens.

And then I laughed. Indira looked at me and I pointed. Ian had turned Mr. Evil Spellcaster into a guinea pig. I love that little guy.

Quick as anything, Theresa whipped off her cloak, wrapped up the pig and dropped him in the lava stream. I dropped to my knees in prayer.

What I will relate here was told to me later or witnessed by me once I was revived by Sadi.

This is a picture of the first assassin taken by the Brass Trumpet security camera as she entered the club.

There were four assassins in all. Two were strictly hack and slash types like the one that almost killed me and the one that almost killed Acgar. There was also two spell casters: the red-haired lady and the sorcerer dressed like a sailor. I’ll probably never know which one killed Buzz.

As battle heated up, Brüs rushed in against the tide of people running away. He focused on Ian. Before he could reach Ian however, the red-haired assassin stepped out of the shadows.

As she raised her hands to cast a spell, Brüs charged into her. His mighty paws wapped her, one, two! And his teeth sunk into her right arm. She screamed and reeled back, knocking one of the townspeople off of his feet. Unfortunately in the confusion, she got away. Or we have to assume she did, because we did not find her body in the room.

Sadi was methodically shooting at the crowd that seemed to contain the other spell caster. Finally her arrow sunk into real flesh and the mirror images of the assassin disappeared. It was important to us not to kill innocent townspeople and so, once the club had cleared a bit, Acgar loosed her acid breath on the gray helmed assassin. He was injured but not down. And now that I was unconscious, Acgar had the other sword-wielding assassin to deal with, too.

Dyskko’s friends had fled with the other audience members and so Dyskko went running, full tilt, at the now solo spell caster. Sadi told me later that she’d never seen anything like it. Dyskko’s hands and feet were a blur. The sorcerer could barely defend himself. She took advantage of the situation and fired several more arrows into the assassin. He went down but not before getting a few damaging spells off. Dyskko was breathing heavily, standing over the prone assassin but Sadi said she only had eyes for me. The room seemed to stretch as she imagined herself running to my fallen body.

About then, Various sent her bat flying around the room. As his wings touched each of us, we were transported outside of the Brass Trumpet. Suddenly we were right outside of Orak’s bathhouse. It is right across the street from the Brass Trumpet.

Sadi lost no time, then, to heal me. I felt like I was emerging from a deep pool of water. I gasped for breath. “No time,” said Sadi as she pulled me to my feet. “Dyskko is in there with two assassins. Let’s get Acgar healed and get back in there!” My mind was a blur as I tried to comprehend her words. Acgar was leaning heavily on her spear. “Used my heals on you! Nothing left….” Her voice trailed off. I remembered the ring of Health that the dire bunny had been carrying. I focused on it and a ray of light shone on Acgar. The change was amazing. She laughed. “That’s better!” It was then that I saw Buzz’s body. I stopped, turning to go to him. Sadi grabbed my arm. “There’s no time!” She pulled me towards the entrance.

I did a swift heal on myself, too. And then we were at the door of the club.

What we saw was amazing. Tables overturned, possessions left, the body of the sorcerer that Sadi and Dyskko had killed. And we saw Dyskko, tied up, being carried out the window by the two remaining assassins. Sadi stepped to the far side of the building and saw the first assassin emerging from the window.

She cast entanglement. Ian let a bolt of lightening fly. Various cast grease on Dyskko, I think in hopes that the assassins would drop him. Acgar squinted for a moment and then she shot acid at the second assassin, the one still inside the Trumpet. I flinched, thinking she would hit Dyskko, but she had picked the perfect moment: Dyskko’s body was mostly out the window and the second assassin took the full brunt of the acid.

I hoped that since Dyskko was tied up, that he was still alive. I have only one ranged heal spell. It will cure several comrades, but at the expense of healing power. My hope was to stabilize him, if he was in danger of bleeding to death. I shot my arm up into the air like I was going to grab the sun and then flung my hand towards the three figures. Suddenly Dyskko began to struggle against his ropes. I laughed out loud with relief.

“Now that grease should do the trick.” Various was suddenly at my elbow. “I’ve made a study of behemoths; please tell me more about this monster that almost killed Cinder.” She blinked at me with all seriousness. “Not right now. Let’s finish this fight, OK?” I touched her arm lightly and then hurried over to Sadi.

Her entangle spell was slowing the assassins and from here I could tell that Dyskko would be free in a few minutes. And yet, the assassins were still moving away from us. I ran to the edge of the entangled area — the weeds were writhing in a frenzy, grasping and clutching. I took a deep breath and bellowed at the two men: “By Pelor’s beard, you will HALT.” After that we were able to subdue them.

We’d told Myntilly that we’d meet her at Orak’s after the show. She’s never been a huge fan of spoken word. When we tumbled in to the bathhouse with two tied up men, our clothes in tatters, Buzz in Acgar’s arms, Dyskko greasy and hurt, being helped by Various…. Myntilly shot out of the tub and came running to us. I sat down beside Buzz’s body and let the others explain. I put my mouth by his ear. “I’m sorry.”

It seemed like a good idea. “Let’s go see Dyskko perform at the Brass Trumpet!” Who knew that it would be the death of one of us?

As you can see, it was a setup.

We settled in to our seats. Buzz and I found seats right up front. Acgar was behind us and Various wandered up (invisible) to stand beside Acgar. As you can see in the picture, Ian was on Buzz’s left. Sadi, as usual, hung back by the door. It turns out that was a damned good thing.

I’d like to think that Dyskko had nothing to do with this. We will know more in the morning when we question him and the two surviving assassins. It was an innocent evening out in Cauldron. A spoken word concert at the Brass Trumpet, our old friend Dyskko performing. I asked Buzz to come along. I wanted the Divas to see how far he’d come in his training. I hoped that I could convince Buzz and my friends that we could use a secondary healer.

Dyskko saw us come in. He came running over and gave me a big hug. I introduced him to Buzz. He was drinking one of those god-awful Cauldron Sunrises that he likes so much. Fruity, sugary, non-alcoholic…. why bother? We chatted for a few minutes and then he excused himself to get back to setting up the stage. As he left Buzz leaned over and said “What was that he was drinking?” I nodded. “It’s a Cauldron Sunrise. I know, gross huh? Why bother if there is no alcohol?” Buzz pulled back to look at me. “Um, you didn’t smell his breath? I thought I might get a contact high.”

Before I could explore this mystery, the house lights dimmed. The stage lights glowed and grew bright. Dyskko had learned a few new tricks since I’d seen him last. Suddenly the heavy beat of a drum filled the air. I felt like I was inside a beating heart. I suddenly felt exhausted. My limbs grew heavy and my breastplate felt like a boulder on my chest. I was overcome with a sense of embarrassment. A big bad hero gets overwhelmed by a little music? I tried to inconspicuously remove my breastplate. I thought I would topple over if I tried to stand, so I slumped sideways and undid the clasps. Acgar leaned forward, hand on my shoulder, “What’s wrong?” she yelled in my ear. “Weak.” I managed to say.

Later she told me that she assumed I’d been hit by a ray of enfeeblement. She cast around, sensing evil in several places in the room. The strongest was from the two gentlemen at the table in front of us. That was odd, we mused later, since they did not attack us.

Dyskko was finishing his tale about the sea serpent. I wish Cinder had been there to hear it. The crowd clapped wildly. As the noise died down, I heard Sadi yell from the back “Hydra! Hydra!” Dyskko smiled. “Well, I hadn’t prepared the Hydra story but…..” And he launched into the story of the Hydra. He hadn’t gotten very far when a hail of ice shards rained down on us. It seemed centered on our table. Buzz was knocked down by a few large chunks. I felt blood on the side of my face. Acgar came up beside me. “You’ve been hurt badly. Hold on.” And she laid hands on me. I felt instantly better. “Thank you, my friend.”

The crowd began to move. People were panicked by the ice. Suddenly the house lights came on. Dyskko jumped off the stage and ran to the two men in front of us.

I couldn’t hear him over the noise, but he was shaking his head and waving his arms. I leaned down to Buzz. He was just sitting up. “Here” I said as I healed him. And then I moved towards my old friend Dyskko. I was thankful that I’d shed my breastplate. I could actually move with some speed without the weight of it.

Once I was standing beside Dyskko, looking out at the crowd, I got a new perspective on what was happening. People were running to the exit, jumping out the windows. It was madness. As I watched, I saw that some people were coming into the building. At the time I had no idea if they were friend or foe. Another wave of ice fell from the ceiling. I saw that a group of people off to the right of the stage had all waved their arms in unison as the spell began. A whole group of assassin spell casters? God help us!

Sadi had, as usual, kept a cool head. I could see her outside the building shooting in through the broken window. As her arrows hit the group of spell casters , they popped out of existence. I did not have time to puzzle that out. The ice had hurt me badly. I turned my back on the scene, the better to concentrate. As I healed myself, I prayed, “May I find blessing in your sight, oh Lord.” It felt as through warm water coursed through my body. When I turned back, the scene had changed some. I could not see Buzz. Acgar was dueling — her longspear was a blur.

I took a deep breath and walked to Acgar’s side. She was battling a man in a gray helm. I realized that she was floating in the air. I frowned but reached up and touched her foot to heal her. As I drew my hand away, I felt a blow on my back. I turned to see a man in a horned helm swinging a greatsword at me. I threw my arms up to protect my face. I remember thinking Where is my mace? And the world went black.

To be continued……